Jesse Koepke

Like the rest of the world, my first attempt at the Lands Between was 2022.

That’s also where my attempt ended.

I played maybe seven hours and got complement lost. Who was I was supposed to fight? Where was I supposed to go? Why was I always dying? Why did everyone I beat come back to life? Why is everything so scary and weird??

It reminded me of another series of firsts. Elder Scrolls: Morrowind was my first RPG, one very first Xbox. I got lost and started over at least twice in that game. Elden Ring was shaping up to be the same thing so I quit.

Wouldn’t you know, two years later FromSoftware released the Shadow of the Erdtree DLC. Everyone started talking about Elden Ring again, so I decided to give it another try.

I’m a Dad Gamer

First a bit of context. I’m a dad of four kids under 7. I run a solo business as a documentary editor and screenwriter. My wife and I love spending time together, and while she likes gaming it’s not how she relaxes.

So is there a lot of time for gaming? No, no there isn’t.

If I had to make a generous guess, I’d say I play about an hour a week. Maaaybe 2 if I’m lucky or ignore draft 2 of my fantasy novel. But I also love gaming. It’s a stress reliever for me and a chance to enjoy a good story, good graphics, conquer a challenge and fun action.

In that scenario, taking on the mountain of Elden Ring felt nigh impossible. 100+ hours of gameplay? I’d be lucky if I finished it in the next two years, if ever.

After a long break from gaming, I’ve been loving the Assassin’s Creed series. The vibe of Syndicate hit the target, and the sorrowful violin and choir that plays when you summit a building is still a happy place for me. I then went on a binge the fall of ‘23 and in quick succession bought Black Flag, AC III, Odyssey, and Origins.

Then came the best game I’ve played in years, Titanfall 2. The action, intensity, and doable storyline was just perfect. I’ve been on a search for another game like that ever since.

So that’s my gaming in a nutshell. Put another way, it’s the opposite of Elden Ring. But hey, 12 million copies can’t be wrong, right? I must have missed something my first time around.

Oh that’s how you do it

I loaded up Elden Ring and this time it clicked. The crazy design, the re-populating enemies, the unmarked map—it was all intentional. I watched a dozen video essays on the brilliance of the map design. I looked up tutorials on how to fight better, block better, level up better.

I was still a novice, no doubt. I don’t have anywhere near enough expertise to talk about “my build”. (I don’t know, I have a sword and haven’t found a staff yet?)

As I played more, it slowly made more sense. The point was for it to be hard; you needed to level up. The point was to not tell you anything; you had to explore and discover it all.

I put 25+ hours in. I finally beat Margit and the dragon in the swamp. I accidentally found the hidden path to the Lakes of Liurnia. I rode my horse through the crazy fire land while my wife watched, cringing as I fled the abominations that therein lie. I got up to level 20-something, maybe even close to 30.

And eventually it was Morrowind all over again.

I got lost. What was I supposed to do in the Lakes of Liurnia? Find the castle and beat the boss, I suppose. But where? The Lakes had fewer obvious places to go than Limgrave.

I started to have a feeling that fighting all the enemies didn’t matter. Some of them you could defeat once for all and got a nice bonus. But the minions scattered across the plains, or marshes, or caves? Not so much.

I know the point is to get runes so you can level up. But it also makes the excitement of clearing a camp a lot less, since I know they’ll be back as soon as I take a nap.

Ultimate cosmic game, itty bitty playing time

The last straw came when, late one night after finally getting the kids asleep, I sat down to play. I had maybe 10-15 minutes before my wife and I relaxed, so I hopped on Torrent.

I was in a huge cave that had obvious next levels to it, so I ran past a bunch of glowy yak guys to find a path. There wasn’t one, but there were altars I could light. I did that and got a notice that something now had power. Oh, maybe it was that pedestal I found earlier!

I rode my horse up there… but no. That wasn’t it. With no idea how to get the lift working or what had gotten power, I went to a transport arch and chose to go somewhere.

I appeared on a plain next to a lake. I ran around and fought some guys but man these were stronger! I ran away and found a camp. I managed to defeat most of them but then the main knight smote my ruins upon a mountainside.

And that was it. I knew I would have to run all the way back up there to get my runes, but then what? I was lost and my game time was up.

So I quit. The next day I loaded Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey…

And felt the first stab of joy at gaming I has felt in the past two months.

I’m just not that kind of gamer (right now)

With my focus on Elden Ring, I hadn’t touched Odyssey in a while. But I had 15 minutes to play, so I jumped to the map.

There was a lookout nearby so I headed to that, synced, and got an easy win. Then noticed a cave nearby, so I road my horse over there and defeated the sirens. I fought off a couple guys at a camp, and then had to sign off.

The victories were nice, but the feel of the game was almost rapturous. The ocean shimmered golden, the footsteps fell crisply, even the sounds of climbing were enjoyable. I lead my horse through lush trees and waving flower gardens.

It seriously felt like a breath of fresh air. I had a goal and a beautiful landscape to ride through. And after that, another goal on a nearby island. I sailed my ship, listening to the waves crash and the crew sing, and then I was off, synchronizing a new location, burning Spartan supplies and defeating the local leader and his henchmen—for good.

Elden Ring is a jawdropping game. The scale, the depth, the way they don’t hold your hand, the sense of achievement when you finally defeat a boss—it’s all award-winning stuff.

I get the appeal now. I understand why everyone raves about FromSoftware and Elden Ring.

I also realize I’m not that kind of gamer. I don’t have 5 hours to explore and figure things out in a gaming session. I don’t have time to wander around a map until I stumble on the next thing to do.

With limited time, I need extra focus, not less. Some gamers look down on Ubisoft for hand-holding, but I’m a gamer who needs a helping hand.

Maybe in the future I’ll be a different gamer. Maybe one day I’ll have open hours and less pressure on my time. (Hahahahaha… sorry, sorry. Ok I’m better now… hahahaha.)

But right now I’m going to revel in a beautiful setting and take the quick wins. Because if you’re not enjoying the game you’re playing, what’s the point?

Is there a game that makes you smile? I’d love to hear about it.